I take my Redskins very seriously. At times I’m like an overprotective parent, hoping to shield my little mess of a kid away from all the harm and negativity in the world — even if it means, at times, trying to protect it from itself.
Let me say for the record, I don’t have a problem with Redskins owner Daniel Snyder. I have never once thought that his heart wasn’t in the right place. He’s loved the ‘Skins, just like I have, since day one. If for no other reason, I’ll always be cool with The Danny for that. But damn if the man doesn’t just make for public enemy number one with the media, who by the way are the people the cover his team on a day-to-day basis. Maybe it’s the perceived arrogance or the limited media availability or it’s just the fact that he’s mega-rich young guy who bought himself a silver spoon and one of the most successful sports franchises around. Whatever the reason, the folks charged with covering him and his team just plain don’t like him, and he gets no free passes from them. Especially this time of year.
It’s fitting that I bring up The Danny the day before the draft, because his name is always floating around out there during the offseason. How many NFL owners have a personal airplane? Couldn’t say. But we do know The Danny has Redskins One fueled up and ready to go on the first day of free agency or if there’s a personal workout that needs attended in the days leading up to the draft, as was the case this week when he watched a handful of kids go through one final session before finalizing the Redskins’ draft board.
There are a few names out there that are being repeated often enough to make ‘Skins fans take notice. The first name mentioned was Virginia offensive lineman Branden Albert, but at this point everyone’s fairly convinced he’ll be gone at least 10 spots before the Redskins are on the clock. With Jon Jansen and Randy Thomas seemingly unable to stay healthy for more than two games in a row, and the rest of the starters all over 30, it would seem wise for the Redskins to use their first rounder adding some youth to the line. But nothing’s that easy with the Washington Redskins, is it?
Another name we hear as a possible addition to the maroon and black (sorry Mr. Zorn, it’s too funny not to reference every once in a while) is Phillip Merling, a defensive lineman from Clemson. He’s one of the aforementioned player who worked out for The Danny and friends 48 hours before the draft. He’s also the gentleman who has dropped on some draft boards because of health issues, specifically a sports hernia. I read on the Redskins Insider blog that some scouts consider him a kind of Phillip Daniels 2.0, of sorts. While I like Daniels — he’s solid on and off the field and has the wingspan of a Buick — he’s never been someone the opposition has to gameplan for. And when we hear about the sports hernia, the locals can’t get a warm and fuzzy feeling. A sports hernia is no fun, and it doesn’t just magically go away one day. It’s the same injury that caused Philadelphia Eagles QB Donovan McNabb to end his 2005 season prematurely. Call me a pessimist, but I get a sneaking suspicion that if the Redskins draft Merling the best-case scenario is he turns out like linebacker Rocky McIntosh, a talented young player who had health issues when the ‘Skins drafted him in the second round of the 2006 draft and continues to have trouble staying on the field because of various injuries. At least they can work together rehabbing from whatever ails them. (In the immortal words of Tenacious D — “That’s fucking teamwork!”)
The other name floating out there is Oklahoma wide out Malcolm Kelly, who I would rather not see holding up a Redskins jersey at any point this weekend. He’s the guy who ran a terribly slow 40-yard dash and then blamed everyone else. Then he set up a “do over” on a faster track on campus and still ran a disappointing 4.63. He’s a player who, like Merling, finds himself sliding down the draft board, only his reason is called “character issues,” which is NFL code for “the guy’s an asshole.” He’s a big target, who isn’t very fast and has questionable character. Where have we heard that story before? Oh, that’s right — the ‘Skins drafted a guy by the name of Rod “Stone Hands” Gardner back in 2001, who is the poster child for that description. If ever a team should be afraid to walk down the aisle with a player like that, it’s the Redskins.
That’s why I’m openly praying for a trade — either dropping out of the first round to pick up additional selections, or to acquire a proven wide receiver like Anquan Boldin, Roy Williams or Chad Johnson. Sure, Johnson is carrying on like a jackass in Cincy, but he’s a Drew Rosenhaus guy, and we all know that The Super Agent is in The Danny’s “Fave Five.” As soon as he gets to D.C., he’ll be smiling and sitting courtside with Clinton Portis at Wizards games or in the front row with Jason Campbell at Capitals games.
At the end of the day, the Redskins need help on the offensive line, defensive line, at receiver and at safety. They would also like to draft a third-string quarterback now that New Orleans has decided to take on a charity case by the name of Mark Brunell, leaving Washington with only Campbell and Todd “The Tasty Drink” Collins behind center.
I traded emails with a few of the professionals who earn a living covering this team, and none of them can say with any amount of certainty what the Redskins will do at around 6:30 p.m. Saturday evening when it’s time to make the 21st pick in the draft. Names like LaRon Landry, Sean Taylor and Jason Campbell might lead fans to think that’s the Redskins will have no problems bringing in another cornerstone with their first rounder, but guys like Patrick Ramsey and Rod Gardner have also been first rounders over the last decade. My advice? Crack open a frosty and refreshing beverage, cross your fingers and pray like hell the front office brings home the goods, one way or the other.
In the words of Terrell Owens (when he’s not appearing on porn websites) get your popcorn ready.